Pictures!!

Wow that took awhile to upload!! Didn't realize I took so many pictures.

First we have the finished first clue of the Halloween Mystery shawl aka Dracula's Bride.


And some close ups.


And here is the Knit Picks Gossamer that I got in the mail the other day.
Isn't it pretty??

And here finally is the Purewool that I got a couple weeks ago.

First up the colorway called Nuts. What I ordered is on the right. What I got is on the left.

I am not happy with the color variance at all. I've got a dye kit coming and I do believe I'll overdye it with some brown and see what I get.

This is Columbia and it is right on the money.

The Lace Blue is pretty too.

And lastly Firebrick. Yummmm!! This is what I was originally going to use for the Halloween shawl. I'll find something else for it laters.

And now for the goodies from Huacaya Moon.

The Moss Kid Seta. It is soooo soft.

The two books I picked up.


Here is the spindle that I picked up awhile ago. I haven't sat and played with it again yet. The roving is much more red than it looks here.


Some RubySaphire sock yarn I picked up a few months ago and never blogged about. It's called Brayden.

A skein of yarn from Perchance to Knit in the Harlot's Peacock or Midnight Rainbow colorway. I swear there is some color in there. It isn't just black. hehe It smells sooo good and is soft and yummy.

And here is the yarn I got for scarves for the family.

Just your basic Red Heart Symphony.
The pattern I'm using is super easy. Cast on a multiple of 4 + 1. Every row is *Knit 3, Purl 1* to the last stitch, Knit 1. You end up with a really nice wide rib. You get a garter ridge, knit ridge, garter ridge, purl ridge pattern across.

I picked up this duffel bag kit at Wal-Mart the other day when I got the scarf yarn. Man I love Wal-Mart clearance racks. lol

And here are my just because prizes from the Secret of the stole.

A really cool needle pouch from Lantern Moon.

A set of stitch markers from The Knit Stitchery.
And a tape measure from Lantern Moon.
There was also a 10% discount card from One Planet Yarn & Fiber. I can't wait to pick something out.

Ok now I really must stop trying to type. I've had a bit to drink tonight and omg my face is getting fuzzy feeling. hehehe *Drunk blogger alert!!* lol

I am a dork

Man life gets away from me sometimes.

Ok where to try and catch up. The tummy troubles continue. I think I know what part of the stress is coming from. It's a bit of a sore subject for me. Suffice it to say there is someone I care about that is involved with someone else. No I'm not having an affair, physically or emotionally. I just have to let go of things and let them be what they will.

After much whining and psycho fits on my part, I did in fact head downtown to attend the fiber guild meeting. Mom had to talk me into it. I just completely panicked and did not want to go. I got down there and I guess there was some sort of mix up with the key for the hall. Everyone stood outside for about 20 minutes and left. I played stalker and sat in the car trying to get up the nerve to talk to them. lol When they left I went home.

Skip ahead to this past Friday. I took the day off work because Nick had off from school. On a whim I called the owner of Huacaya Moon to see if she would be open that night. Turns out she was on her way in. The shop is mostly only open Fridays and Saturdays and only when she isn't on the road for shows. It was a damn dark night to be driving out into the wilds of Iowa. The stretch of road from Dubuque down to Bellevue is not heavily populated or traveled and the brights on my car are not working right now. Nancy turned out to be a total doll though. She has lots of yummy yarns and spinning fibers. She is a big time spinner too. I picked up a couple books and 2 skeins of yarn. It's Madil Kid Seta in a really lovely shade of moss green (#470). I promise to take pics tomorrow. It's 70% Super Kid Mohair and 30% Seta/Silk. Sooo soft and fuzzy. I'm thinking either a smoke ring or some sort of head scarf for lil ole me. One of the books is a "How To" for spindle spinning. Nancy has also offered to help me get started learning.

I've also got a bunch of other new stuff here. I got a Just Because prize from the Secret of the Stole. Lots of cute little stuff that I'll detail tomorrow. I got some yarn and needles from Knit Picks too. 5 skeins of Gossamer in the Blue Jeans colorway. I got 4 more sets of needle tips and 3 or 4 more sets of cables. I just love the Options needles. Plus now that my Addi dealer is off of eBay it's much too expensive to keep buying those.

I finally finished the first clue of the Halloween Mystery shawl, Dracula's Bride. (pictures tomorrow) I've finished another couple rows of the Galveston shawl. I've got about 5 1/2 rows to go in total before the edge. I got some cheapy yarn from Wal-Mart and I'm working on some scarves for Mom and my sil. It they don't get done, no biggie. I am not planning any other Christmas knitting save for one mystery project.

I can't think of anything else to share at the moment. I think I'll go knit for a bit.

Yawn

I had another bad night last night. I actually hurt my throat during the mess. Everything swelled up inside and it felt like I was choking. I'm starting to think the tummy troubles and lack of sleep are all in my head. Someday I'm going to make a therapist very very rich when he/she writes a book about my nutso self. lmao I think I'm going to dig out my sleeping pills and start taking them at about 8pm and forcing myself to go to bed no later than 10pm.

I worked at the kitchen today. I only went in an extra half hour more than usual but I swear it feels like I worked 10 hours. I did manage to get 5 hours of sleep last night so that is only part of it. I only actually washed dishes for maybe an hour and a half. The rest of the time I was helping in the kitchen. Spraying off the dishes was not fun since the food kept making me want to upchuck. hehe With the swelling in my throat I already was feeling like I was half ready to puke. Add in peoples mushed up messy left overs.

I got my partner's name for secret Santa at work today. Let's just say I'm not terribly fond of the woman that I got. I have no clue what to buy her but I do know, I'm not making her shit. I have no clue what to put up on the list for suggestions for myself. I know I'm going to put down that I don't want jewelry of any kind. I can't wear pierced earrings anymore. The holes have closed up on my left ear and trying to put in an earring is very painful. Think I'll put down anything to do with wolves or sci-fi books. Not going to ask for a gift certificate to a craft store cause frankly Hobby Lobby and Michael's just don't do it for me. Although I do like the bead section at Michael's. I need to visit Beads and Beyond again soon though. hehe

Also got some good news from Mom today. She is going to watch Nick tomorrow night so I can attend the fiber guild meeting. :O) She is going to come over here. Which sort of sucks cause it means I have to clean all day tomorrow. hehe But I actually get to get out of the house on my own and spend time with other adults that love fibre as much as I do. I'm going to take a long a couple of my finished shawls. I'll take along the Halloween shawl and the Galveston shawl to work on. I'm hoping to have the first clue of the Halloween shawl done before I go tomorrow and I'll post some pictures. I'm kind of nervous about going to the meeting but I'm really looking forward to it. Hopefully I won't get some pushy woman telling me I knit all wrong and have her taking my needles away to show me how wrong I am. hehe I know I don't knit in the conventional way, but I had to learn from a cd-rom. Plus the cd showed the woman knitting with the yarn in her right hand and until last year I just couldn't get the hang of that. I hold the yarn in my left hand the way I do for crocheting.

Ok, I'm gonna go browse on Ravelry some. See if I can't find another long thread I can get lost again in. I keep finding big fights that just suck me in. I've only posted a couple times and so far no one has responded to me, but I don't mind. It's sort of how I roll on Yahoo groups too. hehe I'm Froddopsycho on there btw. Just in case anyone was wondering and wants to friend me. :OP

soooo tired

OMG I have never ever been this tired.

I woke up Wednesday at about 3am. I next actually fell asleep sometime this morning around 5:30am. Woke up once sometime before 6 to use the potty and fell back to sleep until the alarm went off at 6:45.

I've been awake since. . . . . . . . barely!!

I am so close to falling asleep right here and now.

I do believe I'm gonna go see if the brat has eaten his dang banana and then take a short snooze.

groan

I am not having a good night.

I can't sleep. My stomach aches. I've thrown up once but it didn't help. There is nothing to throw up left, but my stomach still insist on doing somersaults.

Sitting at my desk I can feel all tired and ready to sleep. Even through the constant ache.

The moment I climb into bed, I'm wide awake. I'm not laying there thinking about anything in particular that is upsetting me. I am just no longer sleepy and my stomach goes into over drive.

So I get up and head for the bathroom. I'm rereading Bag of Bones. It's been so long since I've read it that I don't remember the story.

Then it is back to the bed to try again. No go.

And now I've given up. I have to be up in 3 hours anyway. I didn't have a nap today, but I'll have to lay down later after the kid is in school. I can't let myself sleep too long though or I won't sleep tomorrow night. That would not be good as I have to work Friday. And I'm gonna be kind of on my own for the first 2 or 3 hours. TJ is coming in late so he can milk cows. Granted, the regular work week folks will be there, but I don't really work with them.

ugghhhh I need to visit the lil girls room again. :(

Photo heavy post

Here are the pictures that I promised y'all of the kid.



Isn't he scary??



Here are some of the animals from the petting zoo.



The kid loved the goose and the bunny.





Here are the lil goats that I thought looked like lil sheep.



They stayed bunched up the whole time. And those lil bits of fluff on the left are actually some sort of chicken.



The kid was excited after making it through the hay maze.





He is such a lil ham!



And a couple pics of the parents new dog Toots. She just had a bath before these pics. She is impossible to catch still. hehe



Ok, I'm off to play on Ravelry a lil bit more while I knit on the halloween shawl.

Resistance was futile!

I have been assimilated. My new Ravelry name is Froddopsycho. umm Yeah, did you expect anything else?? lmao

I've got most of my books up there but don't expect my projects up there or my yarn any time soon. I'm still feeling really icky and I have shizz to do around here. I'm on row 59 of the Halloween shawl. Renee named it today and it is called Dracula's Bride. hehe

Catching up

Hmmmmm where to start. It's been a long weekend really.

Thursday I did take Nick to the Halloween party. It was kind of cool. He went as Frankenstein's Monster. We had managed to find a black suit jacket at the second hand store. It was a woman's small and thankfully had huge shoulder pads. Other than being a bit long it fit him really well. We just went with jeans and an old tshirt and his regular shoes to round out the outfit.

The makeup and such was much more of an ordeal. First I had to spray his hair black. I had him sit on the side of the tub and lean back into the tub. I figured that the overspray would be easier to clean from the tub than the rest of the bathroom. OMG was I wrong!!! People, do yourself a favor and only use the colored hairspray OUTSIDE!! At first it didn't look like too much of a mess. And then it got wet. There was black everywhere. It's been 4 days and I still have black in the shower and all over the sink. With work I haven't had a chance to really scrub at it. But man what a mess.

The face painting went much more easy. I ended up drawing on the scars as I couldn't find any premade ones at the store. I really wanted to paint some marshmallows and stick them to his neck for the monster's bolts, but I just can't figure out how to make them stay on. He did get green makeup on his coat but it just makes the coat look moldy so that is fine.

There was a light mist falling when we left, but Mom had assured me there were things to do inside at the party. The party was at a pumpkin farm. When we got there the ladies manning the entrance wanted to make sure that Nick entered the costume contest but that wasn't for another hour and half so I begged off with a promise that if we were still there we would enter. He got himself a bag of candy and we went into the barn to see what was going on. The had a large pit of corn for the kids to play in and some rope swings. A lady I work with was there so Nick sung on the ropes with her kids for a bit but wouldn't allow himself to fall into the hay.

Next it was around back for the petting zoo. They had maybe 9 goats of different breeds. 3 of the little ones looked sort of like mini spotted sheep. They stayed together the whole time. They also had a goose, a chicken, a rabbit and 2 strange fuzzy birds in the corner that I thought at first was just a pile of feathers. hehe Nick had fun following the chicken around and clucking and waving his arms like wings. He had decided that the best way to pet a chicken was to make it think you are a chicken too. hehe I had fun trying to pet the goose. He kept ducking when my hand got close to his head. I won out in the end. I've got lots of pics that I'll upload later. I'm just not awake enough to take em off the camera right now.

After the petting zoo, it was off to the hay bale maze. There were a bunch of kids climbing on top of the hay but I told Nick to not even think about it. He ran through the maze a dozen times or so. Then we took pictures with some pumpkin cut outs and a John Deere tractor. Then it was back into the maze. That is where we met with disaster. On his last run through the maze he slipped on the mud. His right leg and arm were covered in mud and he got upset. I showed him how to wipe his leg off on the hay bale. He got the big chunks off and wiped his hands off too. With that he was ready to go home. So there was no costume contest for us just as I had figured.

Then it was out to the folk's house to show them his costume. I had just meant to stop for a few minutes. But since the kid was all muddy, Mom offered to give him a bath there. I warned her that the black hairspray was going to make a mess. She didn't care though. So the kid was hosed down and then mom filled the tub so she could wash his face good. The dog kept trying to get in the tub with him. She can barely get her paws on the top of the tub though so I let her keep begging. Dad however had other ideas. He gave her a boost and she got a mini bath with the kid. hehe Once Nick was all clean and dried, we stuck around for another half hour or so. When we got home I still had to wash his face again with some cold cream. He had a very unhealthy green cast to his mouth area. hehe

All in all we had a real good time. And this has turned in to a mini novel and I only covered one day. lol I promise I'll post some pics later this morning. I've caught myself a nasty lil cold and I need a lil bit of a rest after the kid goes to school. Then tonight I'll yap about the rest of the weekend and why I've got to set up a whole new budget for myself. groan

I have progress!!

But first, I'm sitting here giggling like mad. I'm watching a show on pbs. They just had some guy singing a song in Spanish that was all about the heart. He was describing in great detail how the heart works but it sounded like a love song. The video was mostly animations of a heart working and some very very old footage of hearts. The translation of the song was overlayed onto the screen. I completely fell apart when he started singing "lub-a-dub, lub-a-dub." hehehehe If you didn't know what he was singing about it sounded like a perfectly lovely love song. but knowing what he was actually saying made it hilarious. lol

And now proof of progress:

I've finally finished the second clue of the Autumn mystery shawl. Renee has already released the final clue and also the name. It is called Lughnasadh. Yeah, I can't pronounce it either. hehe It's the name of a Gaelic festival that has to do with the harvest.

Here is a close up of the right side.

And one of the left.

The final shawl is going to be very pretty. I do so wish I could find some of the yarns that I saw some of the other members used though. Some had very very long color changes. Maybe 20 or so rows of one color before the next starts. I think when I get my dye kit I'll try and do some sort of really long color changes. I just paid for the kit, so hopefully I'll have it soon.

Ok, I'm off to work on the Halloween shawl. I want to try and finish the first clue. It's another really pretty pattern. I so love all the shawls that Renee has released at Goddessknits.com.

It's Monday, Must be time for an update

My son's school is giving me a complex. The kid has been doing so good this last week or so. He hasn't brought home any reports that he has gotten in trouble. We have been thrilled. Lots of praise sent his way.

So of course this morning I get a call from the counselor that she wants someone to come in and observe him because she is concerned about his coping strategies. uuuuuunnnnnnnggggggg She says the kid has been doing some odd things to keep himself calm in class. Hand flappings and talking to himself. The crying and getting mad have subsided for the most part. But she says he is still being disruptive with "hand puppets and voices."

I swear I wonder what the hell they would be doing with a child that has tourrettes or some other disorder. Would they be having a fit about them disrupting and distracting the class? The kid is trying his hardest to behave himself in school. He hates having to make up time during recess and miss out on the fun. He has been getting his work done at school so he doesn't have to bring home any more homework than absolutely necessary. And still it isn't enough.

So the kid is a lil weird. So what?? So is his mother. :P He is sensitive like I am too. I can get upset very easily. Which I am right now. I was feeling fine this morning. A bit tired but not ill in the least. I even managed to eat something before 9am which doesn't happen often. And now I'm sick to my stomach. I have no clue if I'm going to keep my breakfast down. I don't get why they can't just be happy that he is behaving and give him a lil while to see if the weird stuff doesn't just fade out as he gets used to behaving.

It's not like the kid isn't doing well with his school work. He is quite bright. His reading is awesome. I am amazed at the words he can read already. Very rarely does he have to ask for help with words. He brings home huge sheets of math problems and they never take him more than a couple minutes to fill out. Most of the delay time in it is him being a goof and asking me answers that he already knows. He is just looking for a reaction out of me. ( I sit with him while he does his homework.) He isn't real good at the spelling yet. Shit I'm 35 and I suck at it. He would much rather just spell phonetically. He tends to write words the way they sound to him and not the way they are actually spelled. The becomes du. Cutting becomes choding. He has sinus issues so sometimes his ears are stuffed up and he has trouble hearing.

I just wish they would cut him some slack. Just be happy he isn't hitting anyone and isn't throwing crying fits anymore. He finally has his cast off and is finally allowed back to recess and gym class. He has to get back in the swing of just being another kid that doesn't need help with stuff.

I'm gonna go lay down and see if I can get my tummy to calm down. I just hate that they keep trying to label him. It's just not fair.

not feeling well

It's the classic IBS symptoms. But I'm not 100% sure that is all that it is.

I don't feel like I have a cold or the flu. My sinuses and lungs are just fine. No sneezing or runny nose.

I just feel off. I'm achy. My back and neck are sore. I've had a headache that just won't go away. Since last night I've had a stomach ache. I've spent more time in the bathroom in the last 24 hours than in the last week. I threw up so hard last night that not only do I have little bruises around my eyes, I've got them around my mouth. I've never done that before.

Right now I just feel like I could go throw up again. I don't know which end needs to let loose though. lol Gotta be careful I don't get a shorts full when I think I need to puke. hehe

I used to have some pills from the doc that helped deal with the nausea. Unfortunately I ran out of those about 2 months ago. I don't even remember what they were called. I just don't know what to eat or drink that might settle my stomach.

Don't suggest Gatorade. I can't drink that stuff. I had a procedure done a few years ago where I had to drink some stuff that tasted like Gatorade and omg I got so sick it was scary. For months just thinking about the taste of it would make me feel ill.

Oh well. We shall see how I feel tomorrow. I did manage to get a few rows knit on the Halloween shawl and 12 rows of the Autumn mystery. I didn't manage to work on Swan Lake or Galveston though. Maybe tomorrow. If my tummy is still being a bitch I'll have to stay home from work again. The boss won't be happy about that. But not much I can do. I can't be running to the bathroom every 5 mins when I've got work to do.

Pictures!!

Warning!! This is a picture heavy post. hehe

I finally got my butt in gear and took pictures of my latest WIPs.

The Autumn Mystery shawl from GoddessKnits.com that started on 9-15.


Yeah, I've only got clue 1 done. I actually finished it like 2 weeks ago but didn't get around to taking pictures of it. Working the two jobs just hasn't left me much time to work on it and the printer was broken and I wasn't able to print the second clue. But I have printed it out and I'm gonna start on clue 2 in just a bit.


The Galveston mystery shawl. I'm still about 10 rows away from starting the edging.


Here is a close up of the last clue. Can ya see how close I am to finishing the darn thing? lol Just gotta close the diamond up and it's on to the edge.


The Halloween Mystery shawl from GoddessKnits.com. I've gotten 34 rows of the first clue done. There are a total of 80 rows. :O( Clue 2 just came out. I'm a lil behind. hehe


A close up of the center section.


And a closeup of the side. It's a half round shawl. First time for this sort of construction and I'm liking it. It's hard to see the beads, but they are a see-through purple. I really love how they match the shawl.

Not sure why, but my left hand is causing me some troubles today. I do have a pair of craft gloves and I'm going to see if wearing one on my left hand will help. Cause I really want to do some knitting tonight. I might even pick up the Swan Lake mystery stole for a bit. lol

Yes I'm still alive

I'm not feeling terribly lively, but alive none the less. The sleep is still not coming easily. Even when I'm super tired. I've also been in quite a bit of pain lately. Last week sometime, I tweaked my left hip. Now I'm waking up already in pain and without serious pain pills, I can barely walk. Unfortunately the pills leave me a lil on the tipsy side. I'm safe enough at work, but the driving part has got me a little iffy. So, no pill until I'm at work and no pill after lunch. No matter how much it hurts. But thankfully, the pills last about 6 hours.

Still no pictures of knitting. I've been tired and it's been icky around here. Hard to take pictures when the lighting sucks rocks. I may have to build some sort of light box one of these days. It doesn't help that the light bulbs in the house have a yellow cast to them. And the sheet I take pictures on is beige. So accurate color is hard to come by.

I've started on the halloween mystery shawl. I'm using the purple yarn I dyed for a past mystery. I really wanted to wait on the red PureWool but it could be weeks before it gets here. Actually, I just wanted to know why everyone was having such a hell of a time with it. I'm only done through row 13, but so far no troubles. I need to find some beads before I get much farther.

Yes, I've signed up for Ravelry. No, I haven't gotten my invite yet. I was way slow in signing up. A certain someone tempted me by letting me sign in using her ID and look around. There are 10,832 people in line ahead of me. It's gonna be awhile. hehe

Head over to MochiMochiLand.com and check out the free patterns. I had to cast on for Bob. I'm using some mystery yarn in a blue color. I've got his snout done so far. No comments please on the fact that I've cast on 2 new projects without finishing anything. hehe

I have been trucking along on the Galveston shawl. I've almost got another pattern row done. This one is over 900 stitches. Very slow going. I'm off work tomorrow and I'm going to try and knock off at least 2 rows. I've got laundry to do and dishes but I think I should be able to fit in lots of knitting in between that and napping. hehe

I've noticed something strange lately. At least once or twice a day, I get an instant message on Yahoo from a male in the middle east. Some are quite friendly and some are down right strange. Yesterday I had a guy who claimed to be a dentist asking me lots of questions about my dental health. Very very strange. I'm just a magnet for weirdness.

Ok, I'm gonna go lay down for a few minutes. I wish I could just go to bed for the night but that would not be a good thing. hehe

I'm a sap

Beck - Loser

In the time of chimpanzees I was a monkey
butane in my veins and now i've become the junkie
with the plastic eyeballs, spray paint the vegetables
dog food stalls with the beefcake pantyhose
kill the headlights and put it in neutral
stock car flamin' with a loser and the cruise control
baby's in Reno with the vitamin D
got a couple of couches sleep on the love seat
someone keeps sayin' I'm insane to complain
about a shotgun wedding and a stain on my shirt
don't believe everything that you breathe
you get a parking violation and a maggot on your sleeve
so shave your face with some mace in the dark
savin' all your food stamps and burnin' down the trailer park

(yo cut it)

Soy un perdedor
I'm a loser baby so why don't you kill me?

(double-barrel buckshot)

Soy un perdedor
i'm a loser baby, so why don't you kill me?

Forces of evil in a bozo nightmare
banned all the music with a phony gas chamber
'cuz one's got a weasel and the other's got a flag
one's got on the pole shove the other in a bag
with the rerun shows and the cocaine nose job
the daytime crap with the folksinger slop
he hung himself with a guitar string
slap the turkey neck and it's hangin' on a pigeon wing
you can't write if you can't relate
trade the cash for the beef for the body for the hate
and my time is a piece of wax fallin' on a termite
that's chokin' on the splinters

Soy un perdedor
I'm a loser baby so why don't you kill me?

(get crazy with the cheeze whiz)

Soy un perdedor
I'm a loser baby so why don't you kill me?

(drive-by body pierce)

(yo bring it on down)

soooooooyy....

(I'm a driver I'm a winner things are gonna change I can feel it)

Soy un perdedor
I'm a loser baby so why don't you kill me?

(I can't believe you)

Soy un perdedor
I'm a loser baby so why don't you kill me?

Soy un perdedor
I'm a loser baby so why don't you kill me?

[repeat]

(This pregnancy is killing you, baby)

Soy un perdedor
I'm a loser baby so why don't you kill me?

(Know what I'm sayin'?)

_______________________________

I had planned to take pictures tomorrow. I was going to clean house too. I was even going to take a nap for awhile.

But instead I get to go to work!!! I am soooooo thrilled.

I'm also a damn sucker. lmao

Got a call from the boss. Turns out they had a 3 hour window with no work study to do dishes tomorrow. So I get to go in. Someday I will learn how to say no. sob sob

I've been tagged.

No, I didn't forget that Susie tagged me the other day. I've just been tired. Not that that has changed.

‘The 7 Weird Things About Me’ meme

So, here are the rules.
1. Link to your tagger and post rules
2. Share 7 facts about yourself, some random and some weird
3. Tag 7 people at the end of post and list their names
4. Let them know they were tagged by a comment on their blog

Oh the pressure to whittle it down to only 7 weird things. lol

1. Apparently, I'm unable to sleep on Tuesday nights. Yup last night was another night of getting up and laying down repeatedly. Had a horrible tummy ache and finally had to throw up. Looked at the clock afterwards and it was 2am. Tossed and turned like crazy the rest of the night.

2. I can't feel heat, cold or surface pain in my left leg or part of my torso. I have massive nerve damage from a car accident almost 14 years ago. I have learned how to tell the difference between hot and cold water with my left leg though. It tingles differently.

3. The book of checks I'm currently using is over 10 years old. lol Am finally ready to order a new box though. lmao

4. I've read nearly every single book written by Stephen King. I own just about all of them too. Some in both hardback and paperback.

5. I love heavy metal music. Current favorites are Disturbed and Korn. But I also listen to boy bands. :-O Much prefer the heavy stuff though. lol

6. I have no fewer than 15 UFOs right now. That doesn't even count the half started self designed lace that is laying all over my house.

7. I'm the oldest of 8 kids but have only ever lived with one of my brothers. And no I'm not that much older than the rest of them. lol We are all grown and on our own now.

And now to break the rules. I hate tagging people. If you are reading this, consider yourself tagged. If you wanna be that is. LOL

Now I'm off to make some phone calls and see if I can keep some food down.

I suck

I promised pictures. . . . . I haven't touched the camera other than to move it out of my way.

I promised a surprise. . . . . I haven't worked on it at all.

I have knit a bit though. I've got 12 rows left of the body on the Galveston shawl. The row I'm currently working on has 898 stitches. Each row has an additional 8 stitches. Each row takes a very long time. lol

I haven't started clue 2 of the Autumn shawl yet. I did download the clue. And I've looked at the finished pics. But I haven't knit it yet. I haven't touched the Swan Lake stole or Etain. Or any of my other projects on the needles or hooks.

I got my stitches out this morning. Doc said my cut looks great. I had expected it to hurt a little, but there was hardly any discomfort at all. I just have to watch it for a few days to make sure an infection doesn't develop.

I spent the morning at Mom's trying to fill out an application online for some insurance. Their server kept taking a shit on me. Only the first page would save. There are like 10 pages. So in the morning I have to call the 800 number and see if I can just fax one pay stub that was missing in the first place or fill out the app that I printed and fax that.

While messing with that, I downloaded a program that lets you snag videos off of YouTube. I also downloaded a nifty little program that lets you watch the flv files on your pc easily. So I now have about 5 videos about Alan Rickman on my flash drive. hehe He is just too damn hot. I have got to see Snow Cake. I downloaded a preview of it and omg, he is just awesome.

Nick got his cast off this afternoon. He was very nervous at first. He was afraid is arm was going to hurt. After the nurse left after removing the cast, he asked if he was getting another one. He got upset when I said no. After he moved it around a bit though he realized that his arm wasn't going to be all wiggly like when he broke it. I guess he remembers more of the pain than he has let on. The doc says that his arm looks really good and is healing well.

Nick has to sit out PE and recess for the next 2 weeks. He is not happy about that. We had a long talk about how he has got to be very careful for the next few weeks. No running and jumping and no bouncing on the bed. I think I got through to him that he has to be careful that he doesn't hit his arm on anything.

We made a short visit out to my folk's house so they could see his poor lil skinny arm. The muscles have really disappeared big time. The skin looks real icky right now. Lots of dead skin. We have told him not to pick at it. I put lots of lotion on his arm after he soaked in the tub for awhile. The doc says the skin should look more normal in a week.

I'm having some very annoying pc problems. I think it has more to do with the fact that it has been on all day long. Lately I've been having to shut it off a lot. I can't leave it sit powered up for more than 2 hours without using it or it will lock up. The only thing I can do when it locks up is to flip the switch in the back. Well today I have been at the pc every hour or so, so I haven't had to shut it down. I think it is just being cranky. lol

Kind of reminds me of my body. I am soo tired. It doesn't matter how much sleep I get. I'm still beat. The alarm actually went off this morning for 15 minutes before I heard it. Granted it was on the floor and partially covered by a shirt and it isn't very loud. But still. 15 minutes!!! And I got no nap today. I was too busy doing stuff today.

Ok, I need to hit the sack. I've got stuff to do tomorrow before I go wash dishes. Not to mention I need to get the house cleaned up. Turns out there may be an inspection next week. gggggaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhh I hate inspections. Plus, I need to find the envelope that has my new credit cards in it. I have a bad feeling I threw it away thinking it was an application for a new card. sigh And I'm almost out of checks. So pretty soon I will have no way to pay my dang bills. lol Wonder if the phone company takes PayPal. lmao j/k

I'm ok, U'r ok

Well varying degrees of ok anyway. lol

BTW this happens to be my 400th post. Pretty scary if ya ask me.

I finished the first clue of the current autumn mystery shawl from GoddessKnits. The thought of setting up for pictures and then connecting the camera just makes me wanna cry. I am Tired.

I took a nap today but it wasn't quite enough. Shoot I even laid down again a little while ago and fell asleep for a few minutes. I am not really all that psyched up for work tomorrow. At least Bluto won't be there. hehe He won't be back from a trip with his girlfriend until sometime tomorrow night. The man just makes me want to smack him half the time.

The elbow is fine and dandy. it looks like it is healing just fine. No scabs and not obvious infection. Hopefully the nurse will be pleased on Monday when I get my stitches out. The kid's arm is doing fine. I do believe he gets his cast off on Tuesday. I'm looking forward to him not having an excuse to make annoying noises with his cast.

Once again he got in trouble for making noise during class today. He has not had one day this week where he didn't get in trouble. He was already warned that if he didn't behave himself at school that he wouldn't be going to the school festival. So he gets to spend the day at his Nana's house with no tv or computer instead of getting to play games. We are having a really difficult time getting him to behave at school. He doesn't seem to care if we take away his tv and computer. I'm about to take all his toys away too.

I've got a secret project I'm working on. I'll be ready to share it with y'all next week. I need to get some pictures taken and get some links together before I can really share it.

For now, I'm going to go find something to munch on and then hit the sack. Have I mentioned that I HATE getting up at 4:30 in the morning?? lmao

Moving on

Have you ever had a relationship that you just couldn't move on from?

It struck me last night that I've been in a holding pattern now for over 4 years. My last real relationship just about killed me. I couldn't let go of the pain and he didn't seem to want to let me move on. I tried for a clean break because of how hurt I was by the things that went on. For months he kept contacting me. He might lay off for a month or two, but there was always that late night call to bring it all up again.

I've hidden away here from the "real" world in order to keep myself from ever having to feel that way again. Only I just really haven't been living much. To be honest, outside of work, I have very little contact with the "real" world. I spend my free time online, alone in my room. I have a very select few people that I talk to on messenger and a few that I contact through their blogs. Other than my mom, I have no one to just call up and chat with in my area.

I've shut myself away from anyone that was a possible friend. I do not keep in contact with anyone from high school. I have emailed one friend that moved out to California, but haven't heard back from her yet. I'm hopeful though. I don't have contact with anyone from past jobs. Even the one I had for 9 years.

I have no one that I can go shopping with. No one to grab lunch with. If I want to see a movie it has to be kid friendly or I have to go alone. I don't even know where to go or how to meet people. So I sit here alone.

I realized last night that it has been about a year or more since the ex last contacted me. He was trying to apologize for being an ass. I hung up on him. But still in the back of my mind I waited. Oh he will call sooner or later. He always does. But he hasn't.

Google is a wonderful thing to play with but you have to be careful what you learn. You see, I know all the IDs that the ex used. So last night after being amazed at how much info I found on myself, I googled the ex. I had already known that he claimed to be married, but well I claim on my yahoo ID that I'm married too. And then last night I found his wedding picture.

And it hit me that he has moved on. And I haven't.

You have to understand that I've only had two really serious relationships. One with my son's father and one with the ex. Sure there have been fleeting relationships that didn't leave a lasting mark, but these two tore at my very soul. I lived with my son's father. We were engaged when I became pregnant. Soon afterwards I realized he didn't want to live up to his responsibilities. For all of his talk about wanting kids, he ran away scared. I've only talked to him once on the phone in the last 8 years.

After he left, all of my abandonment issues went into overdrive. I didn't trust anyone. I had myself a mini breakdown. Suicide crossed my mind more than once. But how could I do that knowing I was pregnant? So I hid away. I worked and read and crocheted.

Then I met the ex. He was always around and knew just what to say. Oh I sure know how to fall for the talkers. They both had their dreams and were aces at telling me what they "were going to do". It never hit me that the reason the ex was always around was because he just wasn't working hardly at all. He gave me all the attention that I had been missing for the 3 years since the last guy left. We were together for a year. I was happier than I had ever been.

And then he changed. We had made plans to move in together and get married. But things got put off. There was always the excuse. As soon as he got some money together. As soon as family stuff settled down. And then he cheated. And he chose her instead. But he wouldn't let me go either. I cut things off but he called constantly. He was sorry. She was nuts. He wanted me back. And I said too bad, soo sad and would hang up.

But I didn't move on. I waited for him to show up. I was sure that if he was really sorry like he said that he would show up. But he didn't. And when I would start to heal, he would call. And again the cycle would start. But now, he isn't going to show up. I honestly hope he has changed and doesn't hurt his wife the way he hurt me and the gal he dated before her.

But, I'm sitting here realizing I'm alone. I couldn't sleep last night. I kept being angry. Angry that he moved on and I hadn't. Yes it's been four years, but when I love, I love hard. I think the only reason I was able to let go of the kid's father is because how much I hated him. Hated him for leaving me to raise Nick on my own. With the ex, I made excuses for why he did what he did.

So I'm sitting here having got three hours of sleep. I'm sick to my stomach thanks to that wonder that is IBS. I threw up last night for the first time in quite a while. Just to make that ache stop for a little while.

And I'm not quite sure what to do with myself. What now? I don't have anyone to just hand out with. I don't attend church. I have issues with the whole religion thing. Do I go and sit through a sermon that will only irk me just in the hopes that someone will talk to me. I've always had anxiety about speaking to strangers, so just striking up a conversation with someone is scary for me. I have no contact with my siblings, so having them help me out isn't an option. They don't know me well enough to make introductions with anyone that would have similar interests.

I'm not looking for a boyfriend. I don't think I have much to offer someone right now. I have way too many issues. I'm just wishing I had some friends to hang out with. Anyone. But I have no clue where to begin.

I always thought the end of something was the hardest part. In reality, it is the beginning.

*This post brought to you by raging PMS and lack of sleep*

I R Slow

And tired too.

Here is my war wound.



Yeah I know it's pretty small and I am a wuss. lol Well I did go back to work afterwards. Most everyone I have talked to in the last few days asked if I got to go home. lol

Not much interesting going on around here. Fixed the plug on my son's vcr and snatched it for my own room. They messed around with the times for some of my favorite day time shows and I need 2 vcrs in order to record them now. hehe Don't feel to sorry for the kid about losing his vcr. It isn't like he has a tv in his room anymore. I still haven't bought a new tv for the living room so his is still out there. When he complained about losing his tv, I reminded him that I bought that tv a good 7 years before he was born. lol

I started on the Autumn mystery shawl from GoddessKnits.com. I've only got 30 rows done so far, so no pics yet. I'm using Fiddlesticks Knitting Country Silk in Spice. They no longer have the colorway that Renee was using but she recommended this one. I'm not totally in love with the yarn to tell ya the truth. When I wound the ball and took it off the winder, I actually broke the tail of the yarn off. I'm gonna have to be careful with this yarn. It's 50% wool, 30% silk and 20% nylon and 800m per 250g. Much thicker than what I usually use on shawls.

I've completed another row or two on the Galveston shawl. Not enough for progress pics yet. I haven't touched Etain aka the last mystery shawl. Nor have I been working on Swan Lake. Just too tired. In fact, I would love to take another nap just about now. Unfortunately, it is time for me to get ready to go get the munchkin from school. Cross your fingers that he behaved himself today.

more proof

That I'm a complete and total klutz.

The pipe that we bend at work comes in bundles. These bundles are held together using metal banding. When it is time to use the pipe, we have to cut the metal banding off.

Today some metal banding attacked me.

At first I thought it was just another of the many many scratches I've gotten while working here. Ummm not quite. The banding hit my elbow. So long as I kept my arm straight there was very little blood. When I bent my arm, the blood started flowing like crazy and omg part of the cut was deep.

Supervisor guy, Fuzz, figured a couple bandaids would suffice. Thankfully one of the ladies that works in another area came over to use the computer and agreed that it looked bad. The bigwig in the office offered to call an ambulance or call ahead to the clinic for me. I opted for the call ahead.

TJ was a great help. He helped me get my work gloves off. He also got the gauze out and put some on for me and wrapped my arm in a pressure bandage. Turns out while I was gone, he was the one to clean up the drops on the floor too.

But anyways, once TJ had me ready for transport, I drove myself to the clinic. After about an hours wait for the doc to see me, I got 4 handy dandy stitches. I tell ya the Novocaine shots hurt like a bitch. By the time he sewed me up I was feeling no pain. I squirmed though cause the idea of him sewing up my elbow grossed me out. lol The nurse reused the pressure bandage that TJ put on my arm and in fact I'm still wearing it. Much easier than using tape or bandages.

Tomorrow after work my mom is going to clean my elbow good for me. Then maybe I'll take some pics to share with y'all. hehe

It's a little tender, but not real sore. Hurts about as much as if it had just been a good sized scratch. I'm just looking forward to tomorrow when I can take a real shower. I can't get a bag tied around my arm to keep the stitches dry. So I had to suffice with a quick bath. I hate my tub.

Ok, time to get the kid in bed and pass out myself. I hate getting up at 4:30am.

absolute brainfart

I just can't seem to figure it out.

The drop spindle has bested me. lol

I bought one off of eBay a month or so ago. yeah I know I didn't post pictures. I'm a butt.

I've watched a couple videos on YouTube. I've downloaded instructions from various sites.

All I ended up doing was making the test yarn on the spindle tear apart. Then I turned it into something resembling floss. My roving is attached, but it isn't looking a thing like yarn. The twist is not going up into the roving at all.

I think I'll stick to the knitting. sigh

I didn't forget

Don't think anyone could. But with the whole depression shit going on around here I have tried not dwell on it.

Just try to live everyday like it could be your last.

It could be.

Feeling guilty

Yup, I've been ignoring y'all. I'm a baaaaad girl. If there were someone here to spank me for it, I would let them. Ok, so maybe I might enjoy that just a lil bit too much for it to be punishment. lmao

Today was my first day off of work without the kid around in almost 2 weeks. And what did I do with my day? I slept of course. lol I've been so tired lately it isn't funny. Not very unusual for me though. Tomorrow I have off work too. But, the kid will be home. We are going to spend the day cleaning and doing art projects.

We just got back from Wal-Mart and the Dollar Tree. We picked up a bunch of art supplies. I got two scrap booking type storage drawer units to house it all. The kid is an awesome artist in my estimation. I may be a bit biased, but I swear he is good.




He drew these all on his own. I had nothing to do with it. All I did was scan them and sharpen the images. You can see more of his sketches at my other Flickr account. The kid draws better than I do.

There has been knitting. I've put aside the apricot mystery shawl called Etain. I'm very close to finishing the second clue, but I discovered something the other day. I am on the last clue before the edging of the purple Galveston shawl!! I'm actually halfway through the clue too. Row 18 of 34. I am tickled beyond all get out. So, I'm going to concentrate on finishing this one.

That doesn't mean I'm not going to be starting the next 2 mystery shawls from GoddessKnits or the Secret of the Stole KAL. God damn I'm weak. lmao I've got the yarn for the fall themed mystery from GK. I just paid for the yarn for the Halloween mystery shawl. It should be here within a month. I'm not too worried about keeping up cause I know I'm not going to. In the same order, I've got 3 more colors of yarn to chose from for the SoS.

I swear tomorrow I'll take some pictures of the yarn I've bought in the last couple months that I haven't talked about. There hasn't been much but still I should have posted pics. I've got 4 colors of Purewool laceweight ordered. Basically they are not solid colors but not variegated. I ordered 2 skeins each of a blue, green, brown and red. The red will be for the Halloween shawl. Any of the other 3 should work for the theme of the SoS. Or I just may go with the yellow lace weight I have in my stash. I'm thinking it might be Purewool too. I will have to dig it out to be sure. But it is the same yarn as what I'm using on the Galveston shawl but a diff color of course.

And I just started a new crochet project. When we were at the Dollar Tree, I picked up 3 finger towels with Halloween appliques on them. I'm going to make them into refrigerator towels for my mom. I've almost got the attaching row done on the first one and then it won't take much time at all to finish. Hopefully, she will like them.

Ok, I'm off to try and get some work done. I've got so many projects going that it isn't funny and I need to get some done. I swear from this moment, only the projects I'm signed up for already will be cast on. No other new projects. It's time to finish some stuff. Yeah right! lmao

I love my mother

But I do not like her.

The more time I spend with her, the more I want to run away and hide. Today was only the 3rd day that we worked together. We only actually are there at the same time for about 3 and a half hours each day. Within a half hour of getting to work today she had me in tears and near to having a breakdown. I even threatened to just leave.

My son has behavior issues. He whines when he doesn't think he can do something or he isn't allowed to do what he wants. He can have a meltdown about the simplest thing. He got in trouble at school again yesterday. I thought I had dealt with the problem appropriately. I gave him a time out when he got home. Then before the tv came on he had to do his homework. Then he was allowed to watch his PBS cartoons.

Today my mom kept coming back in the wash room saying stuff about how she doesn't know what the school is going to do about him. If he doesn't start behaving they are going to send him back to first grade. If he doesn't behave they are going to ship him off to the other school where they have extra help for kids with problems. I kept telling her I didn't know what to do with him. And she kept on about how he is going to get kicked out of school.

The kid has been back in school for about a week and a half. Most days he has had one incident of whining. He isn't violent. He just whines. And my mom's solution is to go immediately to the worst case scenario. I kept telling her to just stop. Then she yelled at me cause I raised my voice. But she wouldn't freakin stop yapping about him getting expelled. I begged her to just stop. So she starts in with fine, I won't talk to you. And she keeps going. By this time I was nearly hysterical telling her to just stop.

Finally our boss came in and told her to not do this here at work. And she finally left. I cried for about 20 minutes while I did dishes. Our boss came in and said she talked to my mom and told her just not to discuss it at work. I apologized to her and said that Mom just doesn't know how to stop when she knows I'm getting upset.

So for the rest of the day Mom wouldn't talk to me. Heck she would barely look at me. So now she is pissed off at me because she got yelled at. And all she had to do was drop the damn discussion when I first asked her to. But it's my fault.

We didn't even make it 3 days without fighting.

tired

My body is tired. My brain is tired.

I haven't been sleeping very well lately. I've had lots going through this ole brain of mine. I feel like I'm at some sort of crossroads. I keep wondering what the hell I've been doing and where the hell am I going.

I'm feeling pulled in a couple directions. There are things that I really want to do but am unable to do for one reason or another. Sometimes I can almost see where it is I want to be going and then a roadblock pops up. My life has always seemed like one big roadblock after another.

I think a lot of my current mood started the day I had my lil conniption fit. I just feel this hole in my life. I can't quite fill that hole. I'm not really sure how to do it.

I'm seriously lacking in self discipline and motivation right now. I need to get my butt in gear and get a few things in my life straightened out. Part of me is afraid of having everything in order though. Hmmm could that be why my house is usually such a mess? lol

I'm a work in progress I guess.

Speaking of which, I have done about 10 rows on the latest mystery shawl from Renee at GodessKnits. She has released the final pattern and it is called Etain. And omg is the finished pattern so beautiful. And HUGE!!! I swear I will finish it. someday hehehehe I've also done about 6 or so rows on the mystery stole. It too will be finished eventually. I think I need to cut back on some groups I'm in. I have to realize that I just don't crochet much at all any more and there isn't much of a reason to belong to so many groups where I don't know anyone any more and I don't really follow too many of the conversations.

Ok, time for me to get ready for bed. I'm just pooped.

I'm still alive

I've survived another weekend. But omg I'm so tired I could cry.

I think I need to find myself a personal masseuse cause I ache everywhere. So, if any of y'all know some big ole adonis type that likes to rub on middle aged chubby chicks, lemmie know m'kay?